When Healing Doesn’t RSVP
A chaotic, cathartic reflection on inconvenient growth and soggy socks
Most of my posts have some structure.
They’re organized, they have headers, they might even come with a checklist and yea I also freaking love a good pro/con list when needed. As someone with a degree in writing (yeah... my first degree that I didn’t actually use until a few years ago), I was taught to be clear, concise, and educational.
And honestly? I love that. Especially when it comes to the kind of material I share here in other sections. I want the facts and the logic to land not my emotional stance on a topic.
But this section?
This is where I take my bathing suit off and run naked into the ocean.
It’s less “wellness professional,” more “Pisces moon journaling through a mild existential crisis.”
Maybe it’s me wanting to write informative, educational content and then still be dreamy and unfiltered in other writing. Or maybe I’m just word vomiting into the void and calling it keyboard therapy.
Either way, I’m having one of those weeks.
You know the kind. When you’re everywhere and nowhere, floating in your feelings and writing from the foggy, feral part of your brain. The part that has no organization and instead speaks in spirals and never gets to the point….
The part that’s not here to teach but to feel.
Basically… welcome to the Pisces Moon corner. (I truly hope my astrologer friends are loving this.)
Which got me thinking:
Do you ever wish healing came with a Google Calendar invite?
Like, “Hey babe, just a heads up you’ll be emotionally cracked open next Thursday at 3:45 PM. Go ahead and cancel your 4 and 5pm clients.”
But instead? It shows up unannounced like a surprise rain. The kind that ruins your shoes and makes your socks soggy and you’re like, cool, I guess we’re doing this now.
It doesn’t care that you’re creating something, trying to keep your shit together, or just having a really busy day.
It barges in unannounced like:
“Surprise! You’re unraveling!”
Suddenly you’re spiraling over something ridiculous like the sound of someone chewing or that one text you didn’t get back.
Or maybe it’s not ridiculous at all.
Maybe it’s an old wound you thought had scarred over. A pattern you swore you were done with. Or a version of you that shows up and reminds you just how human you still are.
It’s humbling.
And annoying.
You can resist it.
Or you can sit with it.
Not in an ego centric way, “look how evolved I am”.
But in the quiet place of ok, I’ll sit with this kind of way.
Here’s what I keep learning (over and over, much to my dismay):
Some of the biggest shifts don’t happen when you feel ready.
They happen when you’re tired. When you’re lost. When your hormones are a mess, your sleep’s been weird, and you’re wearing that same graphic band t-shirt for the third day in a row. oops.
It’s not cute.
But it’s real.
It happens:
When your flight gets canceled and you’re stuck in a weird hotel with even weirder lighting
In the middle of a conversation that makes your chest go tight
On the yoga mat when you can’t even with your own breath
During a Sunday spiral where the dishes feel like a metaphor for everything you’re avoiding
That’s when the real stuff moves. Not always in a “wow, I’m growing!” kind of way. More like a “what the actual hell is going on with me” kind of way.
And that’s the thing:
Healing isn’t about feeling better. It’s about getting honest enough to stop pretending you were fine in the first place.
It’s inconvenient. It’s uncomfortable. It’s not in your five-year plan.
But it is where the shift happens.
Where the old patterns shake loose.
We want healing to look like a wellness retreat. Or a before/after moment. Or at least something you can schedule between meetings or that is my preference.
But real healing?
Looks like falling apart in your kitchen at 11:17am for reasons you can’t explain.
It’s not glamorous.
It’s not efficient.
But it’s yours.
Here’s to the unraveling, the re-weaving, and all the weird little in-between moments that somehow become the good part.
What’s your thoughts?
Was there a time when the timing was all wrong but the clarity was exactly what you needed?
Leave a comment and hey if this hit home (or made you at least smile), forward it to a friend who might need a little reminder they’re not unraveling alone.
Growth loves company. Preferably the kind that brings snacks.